Mother and Author

WHO AM I?

Who am I is a fundamental question we all ask ourselves from time to time. We ask this when we first understand the concept of ‘self’, in early adulthood, in late adulthood—basically, all the time. It is this question that leads us to choose our major in college, if we attend—mine was English, with an emphasis in creative writing—and then our career (don’t get me started there). It is this idea that drives us on a basic human level to provide, make something of ourselves, to express ourselves. No matter your vocation, it is a form of expression. Sometimes it is chosen for us, but often we select it ourselves. This path is not always clear—it certainly wasn’t for me. For nearly five years I worked for an SEO company wearing a myriad of hats. I compiled pages in the backend, SEO’d website urls and page headers, managed sales, worked as an executive assistant, etc. But it wasn’t my love, it wasn’t my passion. I then worked at Allstate after securing my LSP license, but again, it wasn’t fulfilling.

Then I became a mom. The thing I’ve always dreamt of. This isn’t something I share lightly, but my husband and I struggled with infertility for five years before we became pregnant with our first. Being a mom was what I longed for and the vocation I most desired since I became a wife. It just…didn’t happen. And then another negative test. And then a failed fertility treatment and more negative tests. The path was painful. But in 2021, my son was born, and my world changed. It was rocked by a nearly indescribable love and fierce protection for my son. Motherhood suited me. Engulfed me. Swallowed me. While every minute I absolutely loved, I also found it challenging and soon found myself missing—lost in the void of baby bottles and dirty diapers. Sleepless nights turned to sleepless months, and breastfeeding meant continued restrictions on my lifestyle. And I was lonely. My friends either all had kids, but much older, or no kids—which put me in an odd position. I didn’t quite ‘fit’ anywhere.

This led to me needing something, anything with more adult contact and new friends. And while mom groups filled the social side of things for me, I still was missing a creative expression—my creative voice. Enter my wise husband (don’t tell him that or it will go to his head ;)). I told him my dream of becoming a writer, an author, and my desire to create. But there were soooo many reasons why it ‘wouldn’t work’. I didn’t have the time. How would I focus? It wouldn’t make money, or maybe it would, but would the risk outweigh the benefit? But what he said was simple, “what if you just write an hour a day and see where it takes you?” This question shook me. At first, I thought ‘how much can an hour a day do?’ The answer? More than zero hours a day. And so, in July of 2023, while nine months pregnant with my second, I began to write. I wrote through the baby naps, through the tantrums, through the messy home and boiling pots cooking the many dinners. I wrote, and wrote, and wrote—and loved every second of it.

Fast forward to December of 2023, and I had my first complete manuscript of 144k words. I wish I could say that was the hard part, but as I came to find out, querying is what’s proven to be exceptionally hard. Rejection sucks. But don’t give up. Never give up on your dreams.

I kept pressing forward and eventually ended up with a team that has been amazing and has supported me throughout this process. I now have clarity and a team dreaming with me, and helping me bring my debut novel, Fangs of Fate, to your fingertips.

So, to answer your initial question of, ‘who am I?’, the answer is complex. But to boil it down, I am a mom and an author. I am a dreamer. I am a woman with a passion for fiction and a talent for bringing characters to life. And I’m not done, I’m just getting started.

I hope you join me on my continued journey into authorhood. My debut novel, Fangs of Fate, releases on October 29th, 2024. Signup for my newsletter for the latest updates!

Thank you to every single person out there who has supported and believed in my dream—it means the world to me.

xoxo

Rebecca Parcha,

Mother and Author